I thought I'd update you all on Carter's troubles at Daycamp. I really appreciate the kind words and coping techniques from last week!
However... BLAH!
Thursday, he cried when I left him, but said he had a great day when I picked him up.
Thursday night, he was sick and up all night. I let him stay home (to avoid giving germs)
Today was the first day back. He's scheduled M-Th this week, and then that's it.
He started getting all teary as we walked out the door this morning. I didn't make a big deal out of it. Just gave him a quick hug and said you'll have fun. More tears at camp.
I gave him a quick kiss and went to walk away and he comes running after me, SCREAMING "Mommy, mommy!" The counsellor (who is about 17/18) tries to grab him and convince him to come back. Overall though, after 20minutes, there was NO WAY he was staying.
So, we're home. UGH!
I am going to try again tomorrow.
As for today, I made a big deal of telling him that big kids go to camp, and don't get to come home and have fun. So, I confiscated a few of his favorite big boy toys, and we did duller than dull stuff all day. Never heard a peep of complaining from him though.
I feel like such a bad mommy though...trying to be good and supportive/caring, but also trying to teach a lesson. Such a thin line to draw! :S
My heart goes out to you Victoria.
Have you had a chat with Carter as to why he doesn't want to stay? Is there s'thing going on that he doesn't like? Does he get on with the helpers? 17/18 year olds may not be as understanding as the people he's been used to at kindergarten.
I'll be thinking of you tomorrow and hope things are better.
Sparkles and hugs for you and Carter.
Sue xx
Is there someone older / more experienced there than that 17 yo counselor? I would talk to someone about his separation anxiety... like I mentioned in the first post, they will (or SHOULD) have suggestions on how to make it an easier transition for him and an all around better experience for the little guy. I hope you and Carter have better luck tomorrow! (((hugs!)))
Oh, man. That sucks! I like Sarah's advice; talk to someone in charge about what's going on. Have you talked to Carter about it? Asked him in an easy way what he doesn't like about camp? He might start letting you know what's going on through his eyes if he feels relaxed and comfortable.
Yes, he says he misses me...but generally has fun at camp. Nothing else to say. The teachers are nice, and he misses his (everyday) friends. That's understandable...
As for the counsellors, it's strictly a fun camp - divided by age. The two main girls who do his group (3-5age) are just out of high school. They have a few younger helpers. I can see they all know Carter has a hard time and they go out of their way to try and bring him in, give him hugs and reassure him. Definitely caring. However, they are the only ones who regulate his age group - so there isn't really anyone else to go to. I TOTALLY get that they don't have any early childhood training, and don't expect it. They try...however, I can't expect that they're going to run around after my screaming kid when they have 15 others who want attention too.
UGH - I'll update tomorrow We're going back for another try...
At the risk of being the "easy" mom - does he have to go? I understand completely if it is a need for childcare, but if it is supposed to be fun - why push it. I guess I am on the other end of the spectrum, especially with a child that young - lots of years to learn how to seperate and be in programs. Please don't see this as criticism, just raising the question and an other point of view. Hugs to you obth as you sort through it - there is no simple answer.
Jacquelin...no he doesn't HAVE to go - and I totally get that point of view (which is why I crapped out and let him stay home Friday and come home today). I want him to have fun, and obviously not to think of this as a negative situation. I think that's why I'm having a hard time with it.
On the other hand though, he asked to go - and I know he has fun once he's in the moment there. Therefore, DH and I are trying to encourage him to stay. He goes to kindergarten next year, and won't know anyone in his class. I thought activities like these would be a good warm-up on how to make friends, and realize that you do have to follow through. The whole camp is 8 weeks long, but I just signed him up for these 2 weeks so we could do some fun stuff other than this too.
If he doesn't go/stay willingly tomorrow I think we're done. But we're going to try one more day....wish us luck! He says he's going - and he seems happy about it.
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Update on Carter at camp...
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We're going back for another try...
